Over 50% of American marriages end in divorce. While this is difficult for the couple, it can be even harder for children.
That’s why it’s so important to ensure they understand what is happening. We’ve put together this guide to let you know how to tell kids about divorce.
So let’s get started.
Get on the Same Page as Your Ex-Partner
Before you say anything to your children, make sure you and your soon-to-be ex-partner are on the same page. This isn’t a time to argue or put blame on each other. Those are things you should save for the divorce lawyer.
Your kids need to get loved and support from both of you, and you need to make sure you’re both saying the same things and conveying the same message.
Come up with a plan before you talk to your kids.
Explain the Situation – And Tell the Truth
When you’re ready to tell your kids about the situation, make sure you tell the truth.
This doesn’t mean you have to get into all the details (remember, you don’t want to talk about each other in a negative light), but be honest about what’s going on. Let them know why you’re getting a divorce, and remind them that, although you won’t be living together anymore, you still care about each other.
Be Ready to Answer Questions
Your kids may have a variety of different reactions. They may cry, they may ask questions, or they may not have much of a reaction at all (in the moment anyway).
Make sure you are ready to answer their questions. Again, do this truthfully.
Encourage them to let you know what they’re feeling. Let them know it’s okay to feel sad and take the time to really listen to anything they have to say.
Let Them Know What Will Change
Tell your children how their lives will change. Explain what will happen now that mom and dad are living apart. Make sure they understand that they’ll still see both parents and that they’ll be staying at two different houses from now on.
Make Sure They Know They Aren’t at Fault
Many children will find a way to blame themselves for your divorce—even if there’s no obvious reason for it.
That’s why it’s so important to take extra time to let your children know they are not at fault for what’s happening in any way. Explain the real reason you’re getting a divorce (again, without going into unneeded details). Sometimes hearing the real reason will help your children understand they aren’t to blame.
Tell Them You Love Them
Most importantly, let your children know you both still love them and make sure they know that will never change. You should say this several times and give plenty of hugs and kisses to ensure they really understand.
How to Tell Kids About Divorce
Divorce is a scary concept to children, so make sure you know how to tell kids about divorce and take the time to listen to their feelings and comfort them. Do you want some other helpful relationship advice?
Make sure you check out the rest of our blog!
